November, your name.
The month I was born on. The month I was used to despise due to the accumulation of tasks, workloads, and depression. The month I learn to love again because of the sentimentality of certain boy group having their first debut set on. It’s a wonder that the month which I hate so much has such a great value to some people.
And it was the month you were born on as well.
I did so many terrible things to you and I know so well that I have no right to be forgiven by you. It was not your fault that you had and still has no feelings for me. It was not your fault that I fell in love with you.
Yet, I blamed you.
When I was the one who had the initiative to approach you. I was the one with ulterior motive and stupid idea to be close to you even knowing the fact that you had no romantic feeling for me. I was the one who made assumption it was okay all along.
And it was not.
Because it damaged me so much when I found out that you were with someone else. I was shattered. I shut myself and shut you away from my life. And I responded coldly when you tried to talk to me again after such a long time we didn’t contact each other. And you didn’t know why.
And it’s not your fault that you didn’t know that.
I’m sorry that you had to experience such a bad memory because of someone like me. I’m sorry if this experience made you feel bad as well. I just want you to know that it’s okay now. I am perfectly fine now and I’ve learned my lesson well.
That love can't be and shouldn't be forced on anybody.
I want you to understand that it was never been your fault.
I’m sorry that I had such a weak heart to accept reality back then. I’m sorry for causing you all the negativity and all.
I’m sorry.
And I understand that I have no right to reach you anymore.
Now I just simply want you to be happy. And I mean it.
The month I was born on. The month I was used to despise due to the accumulation of tasks, workloads, and depression. The month I learn to love again because of the sentimentality of certain boy group having their first debut set on. It’s a wonder that the month which I hate so much has such a great value to some people.
And it was the month you were born on as well.
I did so many terrible things to you and I know so well that I have no right to be forgiven by you. It was not your fault that you had and still has no feelings for me. It was not your fault that I fell in love with you.
Yet, I blamed you.
When I was the one who had the initiative to approach you. I was the one with ulterior motive and stupid idea to be close to you even knowing the fact that you had no romantic feeling for me. I was the one who made assumption it was okay all along.
And it was not.
Because it damaged me so much when I found out that you were with someone else. I was shattered. I shut myself and shut you away from my life. And I responded coldly when you tried to talk to me again after such a long time we didn’t contact each other. And you didn’t know why.
And it’s not your fault that you didn’t know that.
I’m sorry that you had to experience such a bad memory because of someone like me. I’m sorry if this experience made you feel bad as well. I just want you to know that it’s okay now. I am perfectly fine now and I’ve learned my lesson well.
That love can't be and shouldn't be forced on anybody.
I want you to understand that it was never been your fault.
I’m sorry that I had such a weak heart to accept reality back then. I’m sorry for causing you all the negativity and all.
I’m sorry.
And I understand that I have no right to reach you anymore.
Now I just simply want you to be happy. And I mean it.
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